Why I do not read (CNN) SI

Story Highlights:

36 words.

Actual story:

109 words.

Also, it is rather odd that the “Story Highlights” note the game is going to be held at Busch Stadium but the story does not.

SI Link

Housekeeping Announcement

Really.

If I was arty, I would call this “Lost Girl Alone on the Edge”

Rest of set, after the jump.

Almost Science: Chester Cheetah’s Big Balls – The Cheesiest?

They’re such big balls
And they’re dirty big balls
And he’s got big balls
And she’s got big balls
But we’ve got the biggest balls of them all!

Followers of my often over-sharing Twitter feed already know I’ve been obsessed with these giant cheese balls since they were unleashed on the public.  What a great concept! An even bigger ball of cheese!  I love balls of cheese! Doesn’t matter if they come in generic form from Rite Aid, if made with blue cheese and olives, or if they have the unappetizing word “curds” in their name.  Love them.

So you would link that Giant Cheetos would be a home run?

Not necessarily, and I have shaky math to back me up.

Almost Science: Always Infinity vs Peeps

People who follow my often TMI Twitter feed might remember a few months ago rash of updates comparing the sponginess of Always Infinity pads to marshmellow Peeps.   I even cut one open to examine what the mircle “Infinicel” material was like out of the wrapper and to check and see if it really was made up of ground up Peeps.

From the Always press release -

“In contrast to current cellulose core materials, Infinicel has an  integrated two-layer structure that removes fluid from the top of the pad
and transports it into the bottom layer, where it is distributed and stored. This allows the pad to continue absorbing fluid away from the
source for a lighter fluid mark on the pad surface.”

Of course,  I was not convinced.

Yes, I know I still should do a Super Bowl post

But instead, you are getting a recipe for one of my favorite Valentine’s Day recipes, You Won’t Be Single for Long Pasta.

This was passed on to me years ago, and I think there might be a similar Rachel Ray version out there.  Basically a vodka sauce, but with a better name.  And from my experience, much better than the ballyhoo’d “Engagement Chicken” recipe women love to pass around.

My little addition to what is on the recipe card?  When you toss in the basil add about four or five slices – torn into bite sized pieces -  of the best prosciutto you can get your hands on.  Don’t add too much, or you’ll over salt the dish.

If possible, use an Orecchiette or Cencioni pasta so you can get nice little pools of the sauce in each bite.

If you happen to buy extra prosciutto, go ahead and get some crusty bread, some fresh mozzerella balls, and fresh sage for a nice starting dish.  Slice the bread into bite site pieces, and stack with pieces of prosciutto, one sage leaf, and then half of a mozzerella ball.  Broil just to melt the cheese just a touch and serve.

And this year? I’m going to try this chocolate tart recipe from the Joy of Cooking.

All together, I hope this matches Bry’s Happy Valenpies Day.

Google News Can Be So Cruel

Impromptu Friday Football Foodie – Biscuit & Muffin Addition

It’s hard to believe, but this is the last weekend that you can have a NFL brunch this season.  Next weekend, even if you live on the West Coast, 12pm is too late for brunch.  You’ll need something heavier,  greasier, and… Well.  Lunch-ier.

I love the Sunday football brunch and I am sad to see it leave us until next September.  Name another sport that allows you to wake up and start drinking and eating at 10AM? (Premiere League does not count, because who the fuck is going to wake up and cook at 4am for a 6am game. Exactly.  Footie is for going out and drinking at 6am and letting someone else put beans on toast and spots on dicks.)

So for the last Friday Football Foodie of the year – a Limited Edition year at that! – let’s go for one last breakfast.

Maple Bacon Biscuits and Ham, Cheese, Pepper, and Onion Biscuits.

You know who roots for San Diego?

Effing fairies.*

*Yes, I know I took those pictures in the 2006 loss to San Diego, but the only pictures I have from the 2005 trip to San Diego – which the Steelers won in the last seconds – are of Steelers fans. You know, because there are generally more of us than Charger fans when the two teams meet, no matter the location.

You can pick your team, you can pick your ass, but you can’t pick your team’s ass – “Throwgasms”

Download PDF here or click on image

There is something about spotting a trend, a pattern, or a theme. If you are anything like I am, you suddenly feel about twenty IQ points higher and think to yourself, “See! I totally could have been the guy who cleaned up on ‘Press Your Luck’! But I’d be smart enough to not to hand my winnings over to shady investment brokers! They only get my 401K! My winnings are all mineminemineminemine!” And as a Steelers fan, I love picking up on writers and broadcasters who I think are on “our side” based on their picks.

So while I was catching up on Big Daddy Drew’s Jamboroo posts on Deadspin, I realized he had selected the Steelers to be worth “Five Throwgasms” for the past three weeks. I wondered which team – according to a very arbitrary way of picking games which are the most watchable – came out on top. Being that my options today were to, 1) Do the work that ensures I get a paycheck, 2) Write the last twenty or so “Thank You” notes for our wedding gifts, 3) Make a giant spreadsheet and determine if the Steelers are indeed the most Throwgasm-ist team in the league, I decided to follow my hunch.

Now that this is over…

… I should be able to get back into the swing of writing again soon.

(And hopefully there is a better image of me and and the Steelers garter out there.  Hopefully.  This is not my best angle.)

Friday Football Foodie – Hot Pizza Dip

Over at Playing the Field, there is Hot Pizza Dip and more sacks than the corner market.  Also hanging out with Cotter with One For the Other Thumb.

By the way, if you are not watching the Pre-Game Shows that Cotter and Techmo from Pittsburgh Sports and Mini-Ponies are making, you really should.

Go check the fools out.

Over at the Playing the Field

This week’s Friday Football Foodie: The Original Friday Football Foodie – Parmesan Crisps, Blue Cheese Potatoes and Chris Cooley.

It is amazing how much people like cheese.

You don’t always want to see Chris Cooley’s Penis

So we gave you many more options.

You are welcome.

Why yes we bought the TV a cake

Of course we bought the TV a cake.  Didn’t you? Really? No? Then how does your TV know you love it?

Anyway, be sure to check out this week’s Original Football Foodie over at Playing the Field.  Chicken Yakitori, sparkling sake, and Flat Earth Chips.

Happy Birthday!

Hang in there…

An epic post “So, how about those sports” has been in the works since spring.

In the meanwhile, do you miss the Friday Football Foodie? Me too, so I put it over here on the new site I’ve been asked to be a part of, Playing The Field! This week’s post, The Originial Friday Football Foodie - Tostada Cups and Mint Juleps!

In other news, I started an All-Steelers Bloggers Fantasy Football League! Possibly one of the best ideas I’ve had all summer, and definitely one the best drafts I’ve ever been a part of.

48 Hours until Sunday morning!

The Olympics series of someecards are outstanding

Be sure to check them out at someecards.com.

EDIT – The reason I was even looking at someecards was because Cotter from over at One for the Other Thumb emailed everyone about Tecmo from Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies birthday today. Of course, with my ADD-addled brain I went to look at ecards (since I had missed doing the Cotter post) to send, forgot why I was there in the first place, started to just click around for awhile, laughed at the Olympics ones, posted about them on my Twitter, decided to link to it on my blog, went off and did some work for awhile, talked to a co-worker, Twittered about Texas Gal being awesome with Holly, talked about iTunes with yet another coworker, and then finally remembered I had been looking for an e-card to send Tecmo.

Consider this edit your “Happy Birthday” Tecmo. Chances are, if I attempt this again I’ll forget about it until your next birthday.

Maddenpalooza

Not too much else I can add to the recap that Christmas Ape did over on Deadspin, but here are a few random thoughts -

• When the EA promoters started to get people to the main stage to welcome Busta Rhymes, the people over on the Spike TV stage lost more than half their “crowd” which they needed for the backdrop of their live reports. So what did the Spike people do? Got on their bullhorn and pleaded, “You cannot win prizes if you are not here!”

Fairwell to Bay – Over at Center Field

Small post I did for Texas Gal out in Center Field, as she helps Red Sox Nation get into a Pirate state of mind to welcome their new fielder, Jason Bay.  Let’s hope they are kind to him.

Should Olympians Be Compelled to Protest in Beijing?

Should Olympians Be Compelled to Protest in Beijing?

Small piece that SignalToNoise and I put together for BallHype.

Can a 47-inch LCD HD TV save a relationship?

As loyal B&GT readers might have noticed, there is a cute little link on the sidebar for THEsarahandbryan.com. Yes! Getting married! Love dove! Shove with a baseball glove! Married!

But five years of courtship are not without their ups and downs and for much of 2007, we were not only down, we were out. Fin. Scanning the ads on Craigslist, checking the old black book, and hitting on interns.

And in fall of 2007, it was Bryan’s duty to find a new apartment. “Our place” had been “my place” before he moved in during the spring of 2005. My furniture. My appliances. My closet. I wanted it all back for myself and him and his hockey card collection gone. So he started to get ready for a life back on his own.

Top of his list was replacing the Pioneer Elite HD 64-inch rear projection TV I had insisted that he sell before he moved in with me.

How did I not know about MLB M&M’s until now?

Really! You can even buy a team logo candy dispenser!

(By the way, I wasn’t scouring the internet for team chocolate goods in the middle of the night. Wedding favor research, I swear. )

Now that NBC owns the Weather Channel

This has to happen.

Best 4th of July video you will see this year

“One Week” With DirecTV

Listen DirecTV (Directv? DirectV? DirecTv? DirectTV? Or as you always print it, DIRECTV?), I don’t ask for much.

I’ve been a happy NFL Sunday Ticket customer for more than six years now (SuperFan subscriber for two) with nary a complaint. Oh sure, I cringe every July when my bill shoots up an extra $60 bucks a month until Christmas, but $360 for the football package isn’t too terrible when my total DirecTV costs are around $1900 a year.

And as silly as it sounds, I look forward to the renewal notice. Not because it is a harbinger of all the football yet to come, but up until now, each year you’ve mailed a full schedule and channel guide for the entire season. Everything I need to know in one place. Easy to keep next to the TV. No muss, no fuss – open, read, turn the channel to 713. One year I kept it in my purse, just in case I ran into a bartender who was a little slow on the draw.

This year? A Week ONE schedule and a link to check out the guide online?!?!

I pay you almost two grand a year and you’re saving money by only giving me a WEEK ONE guide? Yes, the magnet that was glued to the leaflet is nice, but I already have enough magnets. Village Pizza, Roto-Rooter, and friends who are too cheap to buy real travel souvenirs have taken care of me in magnet department.

What I need is a schedule. All the games, all the channels. Easy to read. Something I can take with me in a hurry.

Do you know how hard direct.com/nfl is navigate on a Blackberry? Four clicks later and I still haven’t found the schedule, and I’m pretty sober this afternoon. What happens after my second Bellini or third Bloody Mary and after all the scrolling, searching, accidentally ordering Fool’s Gold on pay-per-view, and resetting the parental lock on the porn? Then what? Are you refunding me the $4.99 and making sure customer service is not snickering next time I go looking for Zombie Strippers?

You’ve launched your new ON-Demand service. You’re predicting $20 Billion in revenue in 2010. Life is good down in El Segundo! No need to cheap out and not give me a FULL SEASON channel guide!

Raw Food Cleanse – Day 4

Hands down, the best day of the cleanse do far. Beans as Asians noodles, zucchini “calzones”, a peach cobbler of sorts.

Or maybe it was because I barely drank any of the juices.

And the phytoplankton shots don’t bother me any more.

Raw Food Diet – Day 3

No highlights (okay, maybe the hemp seed tabouli salad, the wild mushroom “pilaf”, and the watermelon) and no low lights.  No headaches.  Just want a GODDAMN CUP OF COFFEE OR TEA OR SOMETHING WARM TO DRINK I DON’T CARE IF IT IS SUGAR FREE LO-CARB TOFU BASED CAROB DRINKS AS LONG AS IT IS WARM.

Yes, this diet is making me feel much better.  Toxins certainly flowing freely now.

Raw Food Cleanse – Day 2

Pictured – Kale salad with Mango Lime dressing, jicama salad, one taco (made with cabbage for a shell), and various juices.

Not pictured – The phytoplankton shot, oatmeal breakfast, two of the three “tacos”, celery with almond butter.  (Sorry, forgot to take the picture first thing in the morning.)

Rape can be funny – RIP George Carlin

This is one of my favorite Carlin routines just because he talks about all you really need to construct a good joke.

Raw Food Cleanse – Day 1

Not pictured – The Super Shot of “fresh water blue-green algae, wheatgrass, ginger, lemon, chlorophyll, and cayenne pepper” that replaced my morning coffee.